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E411 in the Berkeley Art Center’s Small Film Festival

E411 drops inEmergency 411‘s Atomic Bomb and Skydiving shorts will be showing all four days at the Berkeley Art Center’s Small Film Festival!

If you’re in the Berkeley area and have eight bucks, unchain yourself from that old growth redwood, pack up some cruelty-free, organic granola and ride your recumbent bike over to catch Emergency 411 as well as a ton of other great short films!

And as always, E411 is more than happy to become your MySpace friend, even if no one else will.

For more information, visit:
http://www.berkeleyartcenter.org/web-content/pages/filmfestival.html

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This is one role I don’t play

This is about the time I got my ass handed to me by Max Sterling.

Max Sterling asks, ‘Wha..?’To see him, you wouldn’t think much of the modest waif hiding behind tinted aviator glasses, but Max was an extraordinary fighter pilot and an ace behind the controls of his veritech. In spite of his amazing combat skills, whenever he was out of the cockpit our slight little hero looked for all the world like that servile, 98-pound weakling all us grade-school-aged Robotech fans felt like.

His modesty concealed a gift even he seemed oblivious to: he was probably the best pilot in the entire Robotech Defense Force. Through his mad skillz, he was quickly promoted to commander of the prestigious fighter group Skull Squadron. During the course of the first Robotech war, he even tames a sexy, ass-kicking enemy alien. And such a nice young man. Max Sterling was the role model that every skinny-armed nerd could look up to.

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The ‘Robotech’ movie?

I just about did my own Fokker’s feint when I read that Toby Maguire, something something… OMFG THERE’S A ROBOTECH MOVIE IN THE WORKS?

Yahoo News tells it:

A sprawling sci-fi epic, “Robotech” takes place at a time when Earth has developed giant robots from the technology on an alien spacecraft that crashed on a South Pacific isle. Mankind is forced to use the technology to fend off three successive waves of alien invasions. The first invasion concerns a battle with a race of giant warriors who seek to retrieve their flagship’s energy source known as “protoculture,” and the planet’s survival ends up in the hands of two young pilots.

The article says that “The $686 million worldwide box office success of “Transformers” has inspired other studios to assemble giant robot movies.” proving there may at last be one good thing to come out of that confusing Michael Bay crapfest.

RobotechThis story may be a little premature, as IMDB doesn’t list the movie in Maguire’s actor filmography. Still, The Hollywood Reporter and MovieWeb are reporting that Warner Bros. has just bought the film rights, so there’s nothing to stop me from getting a giant nerd boner over the possibility of a big-screen Robotech!

For more, you can join the discussion over at the Robotech.com official site.

Robotech was my most beloved series as a kid, and the epic story would translate well to the big screen. Plus the dizzying dogfights between transforming fighter jets and giant alien invaders doesn’t hurt, either.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I… I have to go lie down.

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Harder, Better, Faster Guitar Hero

I have a lot of friends who are into Guitar Hero, and several friends who are into Daft Punk, but in their Venn diagram, there’s no overlap between friends who are into GH and those who are into DP. Woe is me, for I have no one with which to share this clip of Daft Punk on Guitar Hero awesomeness:

Yes, err… remember that part in “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger” with all the killer guitar riffs?

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Work

Internet on the iPhone: separate but equal?

Much has been made of Apple’s lack of support for Flash on the iPhone, with Apple passing on it in favor of open standards, using AJAX, canvas and the HTML 5 spec to achieve the same slick interfaces that have until now only been seen within Adobe’s Flash player.

Apple has famously proclaimed that the web on the iPhone isn’t the mobile internet; not the “watered down internet” — and yet, it’s not quite “the” internet either.

On Apple’s iTunes page, you get a very cool interactive slider listing all of the company’s hot iTunes-related products, all presented using CSS and Ajax. All done in the browser, all done using open technology. Yeah, holy shit is right.

iTunes store on the web

Now take a look at the same page on the iPhone. It’s similar, but it ain’t the same.

iTunes store on iPhone

Since Javascript can detect which browser you’re using, Apple seems to be slightly modifying its web interface to account for the iPhone. But how many web designers are going to get caught up in Apple’s iPhone-led redesign of the web, only to find out that their spiffy new interfaces won’t work on the very device they’re redesigning their websites around?

Sweetened with CocoaAn internet built on open standards, pioneered by Apple would be pretty spectacular, but Apple is going to have to work out these ‘gotchas’ first. Otherwise, I feel this open initiative will go the way of many of Apple’s previous efforts: Cocoa (the other one, but that’s a whole other article), OpenDoc, interactive QuickTime movies, the Pippin game console and other promising technology that Apple left to rot on the vine.

I for one will support Apple’s initiative because I like open standards and I like the idea that when publishing my videos I can “encode once, run anywhere” — on the internet, iTunes, the iPod or an iPhone… pretty much anything starting with a lower-case i.

And in a perfect world, I wouldn’t be the only one. But I don’t see Jobs’s idea of the standards-based open internet catching on. For better or worse, the web is a heterogeneous place, so any kind of consistency is rare indeed. And for all his shrewd maneuvering, Jobs still has a very pie-in-the-sky idea about human nature. Would you expect anything else from an aging hippie? He should already be able to tell that consumers don’t always choose the best products, and quite understandably, people will make choices that immediately benefit themselves.

It made sense for YouTube to re-convert all their videos into the open H.264 codec to get an exclusive spot on Apple’s hottest new product, but would every Tom, Dick and Harry go out of their way to re-encode their entire collection of failed motorcycle stunts, backyard wresting clips and lip-syncing videos, just in support of open standards? My guess is no.

It would be great if we lived in a world where everyone drove a Prius, roommates would wash their dishes, and everything on the internet was open and free for anybody with a good idea, but as a poet once said, “We live in a world where good men are murdered and mediocre hacks thrive.”

It’ll take some very real incentives for Apple to lure web developers away from closed, propriety systems and into an open and free internet, not just because it’s the right thing to do. If I were to offer my two cents, it would be to make the tools for realizing your vision more available, and make them easier to use. Make it easy for people using your software to get results. (I think you used to have an OS that did this back in the mid-’80s.)


Finally, for those of you at home who want to see the web the way the iPhone does, just modify your browser’s user-agent to this string:

Mozilla/5.0 (iPhone; U; CPU like Mac OS X; en) AppleWebKit/420+ (KHTML, like Gecko) Version/3.0 Mobile/1A543a Safari/419.3

…just resist the temptation to touch the screen.

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Go back to bed, America

About a year ago, I had expressed some apprehension about the dangers of the Large Hadron Collider in Geneva and how the experiments it was designed to carry out could spell disaster for all the atoms that make up my body and all my stuff.

Since then, the project’s scientists have quashed suggestions that the experiment could cause the destruction of the Earth. Meaning we can all breathe easy now. Or as Homer once said (sorry, not that Homer), “I’m alive! From this day forward, I vow to live life to its fullest!”

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a bag of pork rinds to eat in front of the TV.

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Shiva and the Case for The Big Crunch

Yes, the universe is expanding, and I’m sad to report, it’s speeding up. By this time a dozen billion years or so from now*, all the matter in the universe will be so dissipatted that each celestial body will be beyond the reach of the other’s gravity and the universe will keep expanding and cooling, until it’s nothing more than the proverbial dust in the solar wind. Enjoy it while it lasts.

*assuming you aren’t reading this in 12,000,002,007 A.D.

Why is the universe expanding and where will it all end? This deserves a longer explanation than I’m capable of, involving gravity, dark matter and the cosmological constant. But what I can do is sum up the end of the universe thusly:

Have you ever known an explosion to collapse back in on itself?

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There’s no way to emphasize in July

Two weeks without posting anything is kinda irresponsible of me.

For those waiting with bated breath, I can assure you that another Emergency 411 segment is on the way. Still, in the process of creating a 30-second cartoon, I can’t leave well enough alone and feel compelled to sift through multiple takes of audio for the one that just emphasizes everything just right.

It reminds me of Orson Welles, at one time the director of the greatest film ever made, who later in his career expelled his creative energy trying to hit the sweet spot on a commercial voice over for a can of peas.

But first a little background. Orson Welles, director of Citizen Kane and War of the Worlds, each a milestone in film and radio, is perhaps better known for his late career work shilling for Paul Masson wines.

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I TAKE IT ALL BACK

So awhile ago, I did an Emergency 411 video where I suggested it was a “good idea” to “throw your drinks” at the band playing.

Getting hit in the head by a flying bottle at an Iggy and The Stooges concert tonight made me rethink my position. To sum up:

Throwing drinks at a concert? NOT COOL.
Ow, my pride.
Ow, my pride

On the upside, the staff gave me a seat right near the stage for my trouble. They also offered me a spot in the pit. (I declined.)

Iggy and the Stooges, I think.
an approximation of my vision at the time

And for everyone who wants to chime in with an “I told ya so”, or some mention of karmic retribution, there’s a comment form below.

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The Warning Label Generator

Fitting with my Emergency 411 series, there’s a warning label generator website just for making your own official-looking warning labels. I mean, who hasn’t needed this:

Warning Label

The Goons over at Something Awful have already put it to good(?) use, so check out their labels here, before they get reposted on Ebaum’s World or something.